by Chas Bonner
CONFLICT
While driving to work, there was about the 5th discussion on the radio about how to fight fair and resolve conflict in a marriage. It was very interesting and even enlightening, but we will not attempt to discuss marriage resolution, knowing what a tough task that is. Instead, we will focus on conflict in one’s business or farm.
Too often conflict is viewed as a negative, but it can be very productive if done well. It forces all of us to re-think a position, to listen to novel ideas, to work through disagreeable issues, and to end in solution.
First, there needs to be a definition of the problem in order to find a solution. Perhaps the “combatants” should first find areas of common agreement, where there is no argument. Then clearly understand both sides of the disagreement through “active” listening to the other, where questions are asked, perhaps notes taken, and a clear demonstration of listening, with ears, eyes, heart and gut. Do NOT pretend to be listening when merely forming counter-arguments. Remain open to persuasion and demonstrate an ability to change your mind.
Finally, we have all been in countless meetings where 99% of the time is spent on problems. Eventually, we must arrive at possible solutions. If parties to the disagreement are truly listening and looking for resolution, the remedies will come. If resolution does not arrive, perhaps agree to put off until another time, talk it over during an informal lunch or dinner, and dig deeply for a conclusion. If still at an impasse, perhaps it is time to bring in a “mediator” who might be in the same organization.
Conflict is never easy, but if all parties have an open mind, it generally adds to better understanding, a better business environment, and a new and better way of doing things.
Comments